


Leave this backwater town

by pleasereylo



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Ben is 25, Ben is an asshole, Choking, Director Ben, Dominant Kylo Ren, Eventual Happy Ending, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/M, Gaslighting, Loss of Virginity, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rey is 15, Reylo Baby, Unplanned Pregnancy, Unsafe Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Virgin Rey (Star Wars), because im weak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:55:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22903561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pleasereylo/pseuds/pleasereylo
Summary: Ben has been in rural England for two months now, trying and failing to find the right actress for his upcoming film. As soon as he sees Rey, he knows she's perfect for the part.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 79
Kudos: 367





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is very loosely based on that one scene from the man who killed don quixote
> 
> PLEASE read the tags! Rey is 15, Ben is 25 and extremely dubious consent

“No.”

“Okay, well how about this one? She’s my personal favorite.”

“No, she just doesn’t feel right.”

Ben and Poe have been in rural England for two months now, trying and failing to find the right actress for their upcoming film. They’ve already found their male lead and supporting cast– they just need to find the right _girl._

Poe hands Ben another photograph. The girl is pretty enough, but she’s still not what he’s looking for.

“No, these are all wrong. Angelique is supposed to be gorgeous and young and _innocent_.”

“Well maybe if you weren’t so damn picky!”

Ben chooses to ignore Poe’s remark. Everyone is a little testy at this point in the production process; they’ve filmed as much as they can without the female lead, but there’s only so much they can do without her. Ben looks around the small pub, trying to put into words the kind of actress he’s looking for.

“She needs to be the kind of girl who, as soon you make eye contact with her, you feel like…“ Ben trails off as he locks eyes with a woman across the bar. She’s wearing a dirty apron and clearing off tables, hair pulled into three messy buns. Her hazel eyes are wide like a doe’s.

“… like all of your fears melt away,” Ben finishes, voice barely above a whisper. Ben stands up to approach the girl, ignoring Poe’s annoyed grumblings.

He drifts toward her as if gravity itself is pulling him. The girl smiles up at him, eyes sparkling, and Ben knows he has to have her.

“Hi.”

* * *

“You stay away from that boy, Rey. He’s no good.”

“But he’s a director, Maz! And he wants _me_ to be in his movie. Isn’t that exciting?”

Rey still can’t believe it. Out of everyone in this stupid village, he chose _her_. Rey gets butterflies in her stomach when she thinks about her conversation with him a few hours earlier– that is, until Maz shooed him away and sent Rey back to do dishes.

“You are fifteen. You need to focus on your schoolwork, not filming a movie.”

“But–“

“No.”

“You never let me do anything!” Rey yells. She strides across the kitchen to get face-to-face with her adopted mother. Even though Rey has at least a foot on the little woman, Maz stands her ground. “You homeschool me because ‘the boys at school are trouble,’ and then you work me in the pub all day so I can’t go out and make friends!”

Maz doesn’t even flinch. “ _I said no_. End of story. You’ll understand when you’re older.”

Rey huffs and runs up the stairs to her room above the pub. How dare Maz act like this? She doesn’t even _know_ Ben! He seemed so nice when he talked with her earlier. _Whatever_. Maz can’t stop her. Rey had a feeling this would happen, so she made plans to meet Ben anyway.

Maz is just jealous– jealous that she’s stuck in this stupid little village forever. Well, that won’t be Rey.

***

They’re lying on the roof of the pub, looking up at the stars. It’s late because Rey had to wait until Maz fell asleep, then she snuck out of her window and met Ben on the roof. It’s all very _Romeo and Juliet_.

“Do you really think I could be a movie star?” Rey whispers once they’re settled on the blanket she laid out. She hates that she sounds insecure– meek.

Ben turns on his side to face her.

“A little village girl like me?” Rey continues. Her eyes glisten.

Ben looks straight into her hazel eyes and reaches a hand up to stroke her cheek. “I’m serious, Rey. You could be someone.”

“You’re either very crazy or very cruel.” Rey faintly smiles and shakes her head, chestnut hair falling over her delicate features.

“An artist has to be,” he replies.

“Crazy? …Or cruel?”

Ben leans close to Rey– so close that their arms are flush against each other. He either forgets or ignores her question, but she’s too wrapped up in the heat of his body to care.

It feels electric where they’re touching.

The moment is so charged with tension, Rey doesn’t think she can take it anymore. Thankfully, Ben leans forward and catches her lips in a kiss.

Rey lets out a surprised gasp against his mouth– his lips are soft. Rey’s never kissed anyone before, so she’s not really sure what to do with herself. After a moment, she follows the motion of Ben’s lips and kisses him back, causing Ben to groan.

“Knew I had to have you the moment I saw you,” Ben mumbles. He pushes his tongue into her mouth and Rey lets out a soft ‘oh.’ Ben reaches up and presses a large hand over her mouth. “Shh, sweetheart. We don’t want to wake up your mother, now, do we?”

Rey’s eyes widen at the mention of Maz; she was so caught up in Ben kissing her that she almost forgot about her. Rey loves her, deep down– even if she is ridiculously strict. If she finds Rey like this, Maz _will_ kill her. So, Rey pulls away from Ben.

Or at least she tries to.

“Where do you think you’re going, sweetheart?” he asks.

“Maz will kill me if she finds us.” Rey leans away, but Ben follows.

“I thought you wanted to be a movie star?”

Rey’s heart sinks. “I do! I do, it’s just that Maz doesn’t like me talking to boys yet and–“

“I thought we were having a good time, Rey. This is what famous people _do_. But clearly you’re not ready for Hollywood.” Ben grabs his messenger bag and moves to sit up, but Rey pulls him back down.

“No, I am ready! I swear I am.”

“Then prove it.”

Ben searches her eyes and Rey releases a shaky breath. Okay. She can do this– she knows what he wants. Slowly, she pushes the strap of her white dress down her shoulder, then the other. Ben’s eyes devour her every movement, hungry.

When the second strap falls, Rey pushes her dress down until her breasts are exposed to the cool night air. She gets goosebumps all along her arms and her nipples pebble. Ben takes her in, pupils blown wide.

“Good girl.”

With that, his hands move up to cup her breasts and he kisses her. Rey kisses him back, not wanting to upset him again. His touch feels good and Rey lets a moan slip despite herself.

“You like this?” Ben nibbles at her lip, then moves down to suck at her neck, leaving bruises. “I thought you were a good girl, Rey?”

“I- I am. I’ve never done this before,” Rey stutters.

“I know, sweetheart, I know. I’ll get you warmed up first.”

Ben presses a quick kiss to her lips before he slides her dress up, exposing her bare legs and panties to him. He eases her underwear down slowly; when it’s all the way off, he bunches it up and tosses it onto his bag.

He stares at her cunt as if mesmerized, but Rey doesn’t have time to feel insecure. He sticks a finger into her without warning, and Rey lets loose another yelp. The hand that isn’t in her cunt comes up to cover her mouth again. “What did I say, sweetheart? Quiet.”

His index finger pumps in and out of her while his thumb circles her clit. Rey doesn’t want it to feel good, but it does– she feels herself getting wetter and moans against Ben’s hand. He adds a second finger, stretching her. When he crooks his fingers inside her just so, Rey comes, vision whiting out. If it weren’t for Ben’s hand covering her mouth, the whole village might’ve heard her scream.

Ben pulls his fingers out of her with a wet squelch. Rey starts to pull her dress back up, but Ben grabs her wrist with his clean hand to stop her.

“Ah-ah. I’m not done yet.”

Rey freezes. He doesn’t mean…?

Ben unbuttons his jeans and lowers them just enough to pull his member out. It’s big and thick and it looks _angry_. He reaches a hand back to Rey’s still-exposed cunt and gathers some of the wetness there, rubbing it along his cock as lube. Rey is still frozen in shock; she’s not sure if she’s ready to have sex yet.

Before she can process what’s happening, Ben pushes into her.

“Fuck, sweetheart. You’re so tight.” He’s halfway in.

“Wait, Ben,” Rey puffs out. It hurts, and he’s not wearing a condom. “C-condom?”

Ben huffs loudly. “I thought you wanted to _be_ somebody, Rey. Get out of this backwater town.”

Rey _does_ want to get out of here, desperately, so she just bites her lip and nods. She has no friends, no other family besides Maz. She’s lonely.

Ben pushes the rest of the way into her and Rey’s face scrunches up in pain. He’s too big. Ben leans down and latches onto one of her nipples, swirling it around with his tongue.

He pulls out of her torturously slow and Rey can feel every drag of his cock on her walls. He slams back into her without preamble and Rey can’t help but cry out. It feels like she’s being stabbed over and over. His hand wraps around her throat and squeezes. Not too hard, but just enough to make Rey squirm.

“ _What did I say about being quiet_?” He’s thrusting in and out of her slowly.

“I’m sorry,” Rey rasps. _Stupid,_ she berates herself. _Why couldn’t I just listen to him?_

Ben lets go a moment later and Rey sucks in as much air as she can. She won’t make that mistake again.

“I forgive you,” Ben pants. He presses a gentle kiss to her forehead and thrusts into her again. Maybe it’s the lack of oxygen speaking, but she thinks it doesn’t hurt so bad anymore. Ben’s hands grip her hips as he pumps into her, bruising.

“You feel so good, baby. So tight and wet.”

Rey’s eyes roll into the back of her head as he hits a spot deep inside her that makes her see stars. She reaches up and threads her fingers in Ben’s hair, tugging on it lightly. Ben’s pace increases– he grabs one of her legs and moves it from his waist to throw over his shoulder. Their bodies slap together obscenely each time he bottoms out inside her.

Ben’s thrusts are erratic now, and Rey can tell he’s close. His eyes are like a man possessed– like he doesn’t even see her.

“Gonna come– s _hit_. Gonna come inside you. So fucking tight–“

Rey’s eyes widen– she’d momentarily forgotten all about _that_. She’s not on birth control or anything, but she’s afraid if she tells Ben to pull out that he’s going to get mad and choke her again.

He pounds into her a few more times, _hard_ , and then roots himself in as deep as he can; he comes inside her with long spurts, panting into her neck. Rey’s insides are flooded with an unfamiliar warmth that leaks past Ben’s cock and onto her thighs. _Shit_.

After what feels like hours, Ben pulls out of her and rolls onto his back. Rey looks up at the stars and tries not to cry. Her thighs ache and she feels gross but at least now she can finally leave this place.

* * *

“Pack everything up. We’re going to a different location.”

“What?” Poe asks, bewildered. Ben purses his lips.

“I want to leave within the hour, Poe. And we need to find a new actress for Angelique.”

“What the fuck happened to the girl from yesterday? Rey. You said that she was perfect.”

“She’s not the right fit for the movie anymore.”

“But you said you wanted someone gorgeous and young and–“

“And _innocent_.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Atonement.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo I've debated posting this for literally EVER because I knew a lot of ppl wouldn't like it. I know a lot of y'all wanted me to cut off Ben's balls or whatever but I just couldn't do it okay?! I have to have a happy ending bc real life sucks
> 
> *Don't read this if you are looking for revenge or justice, because you will not get it*
> 
> TW: rape aftermath (not in too much detail), unplanned pregnancy

_**10 years later** _

Rey is sitting on the couch in her two-bedroom London flat; Kira, her daughter, is patiently sitting on the floor between her knees as Rey braids the little girl’s hair. Kira’s hair is shiny and jet-black like her father’s, nearly down to her elbows.

“Your hair is getting so long, baby girl. We need to get it cut soon.”

“No!” Kira squeals. “I like when it’s long.”

Rey sighs, not wanting to pick this battle. She finishes the intricate French braid on Kira’s head, then pulls her up to sit on the couch next to her. Kira hardly notices, too distracted playing some game on her Nintendo DS.

Kira’s ears stick out of the side of her head like satellite dishes and it reminds Rey so much of Ben it hurts. She tries not to think of him (and she’s been pretty successful at doing so over the last nine-ish years), but sometimes she can’t help it. Him and Kira look eerily similar– from her inky black hair, to her ears, to her height– it’s all Ben. Rey supposes that Kira has her nose and hazel eyes, though.

She kisses her daughter’s forehead because she knows it annoys her. Kira is nine, almost ten, and is starting to get to the phase where she thinks her mom isn’t cool anymore.

“Gross, Mom,” she says.

“You know I love you, right?” Rey presses another kiss to the girl’s forehead, then another, and then Rey is smattering kisses all over her face. Kira throws down her Nintendo, giggling.

“Stop it, Mom!” Kira says between giggles. “I love you too, okay! Now stop!”

Satisfied with her response, Rey turns her attention to the TV in front of her. She has it turned on to some random channel, mostly for background noise. She doesn’t realize until it’s too late what show is playing: the BAFTAs– the British Academy of Film and Television Arts annual award show. _Fuck_.

Rey avoids all things Hollywood like the plague, yet she still hears Ben’s name _everywhere_. She swears he gets nominated for ‘Best Director’ every. fucking. year. He doesn’t even attend any of the award shows– people say he’s something of a hermit, which Rey thinks is funny because he didn’t seem like a hermit when he knocked her up.

It’s hard for Rey to think about that night. It took years of therapy for her to understand what really happened– that he raped her. Her emotions are conflicted because, yes, that was one of the worst nights of her life. But, it gave her Kira. And Rey loves Kira more than anything in the world. She would do anything to protect her daughter– including keeping her from Ben.

So, when the television shows celebrities arriving at the BAFTAs, Rey nearly chokes when none other than Ben Solo appears on the screen. He hasn’t shown up to an award show in 10 years (not that Rey has been keeping track.)

He’s wearing a simple black and white tuxedo, hair shorter than Rey remembers. The press yell at him to pose for a picture, but he practically runs past all of them and heads straight inside.

She changes the channel before she can see any more.

***

Rey is awoken the next morning by the buzz of her phone. It’s a text message from Finn, Rey’s best friend and coworker at _Starkiller Daily_. He writes for the sports column, while Rey does the lifestyle section.

> **Finn:** Can I take you and Kira out for brunch? Had a crazy night last night xx

_Sure, we’ll meet you at the Cantina at 10_

Rey shakes her head at her best friend’s text– _every_ night is a crazy night for him. She swears he has a new boyfriend every week. Kira, at least, is excited to see her Uncle Finn again. Once they both get ready and arrive at the restaurant, she runs into his arms, squealing.

“Uncle Finn!”

“Hey, Peanut!” he picks up the little girl and swirls her around. “I got a present for you.” Rey rolls her eyes– Finn always buys Kira a present when he wants to distract her so he can talk to Rey alone.

“Woah, a new scooter! Thanks, Uncle Finn!”

Rey and Finn find a table next to the sidewalk so that Kira can ride her new scooter while they talk. It’s a quiet Sunday morning, and the restaurant faces a sprawling green park, so Rey doesn’t have to worry about cars.

“She’s spoiled rotten because of you,” Rey jokes.

“Oh, you’re ten times worse than I am, don’t even try to deny it.”

Rey chuckles because it’s true. She was never allowed to do anything growing up, and Maz didn’t have money for fancy toys. So, now that Rey is on her own, with a good job and steady income, she strives to give her daughter everything she never had.

When the waitress approaches their table, Finn and Rey list their orders from memory. They’ve eaten at the Cantina so many times they don’t need a menu. Making sure to keep a close eye on her daughter, Rey asks Finn about his night while they wait for their food.

“So? What crazy hookup story do you have to tell me this time?”

“How dare you assume I brought you here for another Grindr hookup story!” Finn holds a hand to his chest, feigning offense.

Rey smacks him lightly on the arm. “Come on, you know I love it. I live through you.”

Something flickers through Finn’s eyes that almost looks like pity, but it’s gone before Rey can examine it. She’s never told anyone (besides her therapist) what happened to her, but she thinks Finn can connect the dots. 

He shakes it off, launching into his story. “So, get this: you know how the BAFTAs were last night?” Rey nods. “Well, I thought it would be fun to hop on Grindr and see if I could find any famous people...”

“You didn’t,” Rey utters.

“Oh, but I did! And you’ll never guess who I matched with…” He pauses for dramatic effect. “Poe. Fucking. Dameron!”

Rey’s heart sinks to the bottom of her stomach. “Poe Dameron, as in director of _Space Wars_ Poe Dameron?”

_As in, Ben Solo’s best fucking friend with whom he frequently collaborates? That Poe Dameron?_ Rey thinks.

“Yes! Can you believe it!” Finn exclaims, not noticing Rey’s trepidation. “And this is where we get to the good part– he invited me to his hotel room after the BAFTAs! Rey, I hooked up with Poe _fucking_ Dameron!”

Instinctively, Rey double checks on Kira; she’s playing in the grass now, chasing some birds. Safe, she’s safe. She swallows down her nausea. “That’s crazy, Finn! How was it?”

“When I tell you, you would not _believe_ –“ Finn cuts himself short, abruptly sinking into his chair and lifting up a menu to hide his face.

“What the hell are you doing, Finn?” Rey asks, confused.

“Shh!” Finn hisses. “Rey, he’s here! He literally just walked in. Hide me.”

Rey turns toward the door to see who Finn is talking about, and she sees _him_. Ben Solo. The man of her nightmares. The man of her dreams. He's walking into the restaurant with Poe Dameron; Rey freezes, unable to breathe, unable to move.

Her silence must worry Finn, because he lowers the menu slightly to look her. “Rey? You okay?”

“Finn!” a voice from across the restaurant yells. 

“Shit, he sees me!” Finn whispers. Knowing he’s been caught, Finn sets the menu down altogether and waves at Poe who’s located somewhere behind Rey’s back. Rey faces forward, determined not to look behind her. Ben hasn’t seen her yet, so if she doesn’t turn to face him, maybe she’ll be able to slip out of the restaurant without him noticing.

But then Rey hears footsteps approaching, and all the color drains from her face.

“Mind if we join you?” Poe asks. “This place is packed.”

Rey tries to make desperate eye contact with Finn, but he doesn’t see her.

“… Sure,” he says.

Without further discussion, Poe sits down to the left of Finn, and Ben sits down right next to her. Rey’s shoulders tense.

“I’m Poe, and this is my friend, Ben,” Poe introduces. When Ben finally turns to look at Rey, he nearly jumps out of his seat like he's seen a ghost. His eyes widen like saucers.

“Rey?”

Finn’s eyebrows furrow. “Do you two know each other?”

Rey’s eyes dart to Kira– it looks like she’s still running around in the grass. Rey doesn’t know if she believes in God, but right now she’s praying to any deity who will listen that her daughter stays over there.

“No,” Rey says while Ben breathes _yes_.

Poe stares at Rey, unflinching, until recognition seems to click into place. “Holy shit, you’re Rey!” he exclaims. “You’re the girl that Ben hasn’t _shut up_ about for 10 years.”

Three things happen simultaneously: Finn spits out his drink, Rey chokes on her spit, and the waitress brings over their food. _What?_

Pulling out her phone while everyone is distracted, Rey sends a quick text to Finn.

_Watch Kira. I’ll be right back._

Finn checks his phone, then looks at her questioningly. Before he can say anything, Rey stands up. “Want to go for a walk?” she asks Ben.

***

She walks Ben in the opposite direction of Kira, needing to get him as far from her as possible. He hasn’t seen their daughter yet, and Rey intends to keep it that way.

“So… how have you been?” Ben tries, breaking the silence. Rey thought it would be better to have this conversation away from Finn and Poe’s nosy ears, but now she regrets not having Finn with her.

“Fine.” She doesn’t give him any more information, because the less he knows the better. The only reason she wants to talk to him is because of Poe’s comment– for some reason, she needs to know what he meant.

“Maz?” he asks.

“Dead.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“No, you’re not.”

He chews his lip, hesitating like there’s something he wants to ask her but is too afraid.

“What did Poe mean back there, when he said, ‘the girl you haven’t shut up about?’”

“I–I’ve been looking for you. For seven years.” Rey’s heart thumps against her chest at his words. “I went back to Maz’s, but it was closed, boarded up. I couldn’t find you.”

“I moved to London after she died.”

He nods like that makes sense, then smiles softly. “So, you got out of there? Just like you always wanted to?”

Rey chuckles humorlessly. “You know, I actually started to like living there, once I got out of my rebellious teens. But then Maz died, and I couldn’t keep up with the pub by myself, especially with–” Rey bites her tongue. She almost accidentally brought up Kira– what is wrong with her? What happened to ‘the less information she shares, the better’?

“I’m so sorry, Rey,” Ben says, eyes downcast. “I don’t expect you to forgive me, but–“

“I don’t,” she interrupts. He nods sadly, understanding. They’re quiet for a long time, the sound of birds chirping their only reprieve.

“Why did you come looking for me?”

Ben’s eyes brighten slightly, looking hopeful. “I wanted to apologize.” Rey snorts. He continues anyway, “I've been going to therapy to sort out my issues for almost eight years now. I want to make things right.”

"You raped me and then abandoned me, Ben. You can't make that right."

He doesn't react to her words, doesn't even flinch. He just says, voice barely above a whisper, "I know."

Something in Rey’s chest softens, just a little bit. She still hates him, but he looks absolutely wrecked. Ben stops walking and fishes something out of his pocket: a key. He hands it to her.

“I bought the pub. I don’t know why– I just couldn’t bear to see it rotting away like that. I flew here for a couple of weeks every year to fix it up and look for you. I never reopened it or anything, but… I don’t know. It’s yours, if you want it.”

Tears bead in Rey’s eyes. She had heard that somebody bought the pub, and assumed it was gone forever. But now he’s telling her that it’s hers again, that she can go back if she wants to; can take Kira back to the place she was raised the first two years of her life.

He scratches his scalp awkwardly when Rey doesn’t respond. “Like I said, I don’t expect you to forgive me. But… yeah. I–I’ll leave you alone now.” He hesitates, then starts walking away slowly as if he’s waiting for Rey to stop him.

She doesn’t.

***

_**One year later** _

Ben excitedly climbs the hill to a familiar pub in rural England, still in disbelief that he's back. He holds the envelope in his hand, the one inviting him here for Finn and Poe's wedding next week. The envelope contains Finn and Poe's immaculate wedding invitation, plus a handwritten note from Rey. _Poe needs his best friend at his wedding, and we need to talk,_ the note reads.

The sun is just starting to set on the horizon when he sees the pub for the first time in a year. It looks so different now than it did last year; where before it was plain and a little grimy, now it’s bathed in golden sunlight and surrounded by flowers. Somebody added a white gazebo in the back of it, too– no wonder Finn and Poe want to get married here.

Families litter the tables outside, eating and drinking in the summer air. Rey did it, he thinks. She really did it. She turned Maz’s run-down bar into her own creation, unique and beautiful just like her.

Even though he was invited, Ben creeps over to a vine-covered window and peeks into the inside of the restaurant where more people are seated. That’s when he sees her again, running between tables, filling up water glasses. Finn helps her, carrying plates of food out to customers, while Poe sits and plays cards with an older guy Ben can't make out.

Rey is tanner than when he last saw her, hair still in three adorably messy buns. She’s laughing and smiling and she looks happy. _Good_. That’s all Ben wants. He wonders, absentmindedly, if she's found someone else– a husband or a boyfriend.

But he pushes down his feelings of jealousy immediately– it's none of his business what she does with her love life. Ben, for his part, hasn't been with anyone in eight years. He doesn't know if it's because he's been punishing himself, or subconsciously waiting for her. Probably a bit of both. 

He wonders if she's seen any of his movies. If she knows that they were all about her.

He turns around to head into the pub, but is brought up short by a little girl standing right behind him. He jumps.

“What are you doing?” the girl asks, curious. She’s looking up at him with big hazel eyes that feel familiar.

“Um, nothing, I was just–“ Ben stops in his tracks as he looks at the girl more closely. Her delicate nose and cheeks are smattered in freckles and her jet-black hair is pulled into two French braids on the side of her head, causing her ears to stick out. It’s the ears that trip Ben up– they look exactly like _his_ ears, but not quite as bad.

His heart races. _She can’t be, can she?_

“How old are you?” he asks the girl.

She gives him a gap-toothed grin. “Ten and three-quarters! My birthday is next month.”

It feels like gravity has been pulled from under Ben’s feet. He can’t think, can’t process anything. It couldn’t be. He would know if– if _that_ had happened. Rey would have told him, maybe not right away, but when he saw her last year. Right?

“Kira, dinner’s ready!” Rey’s voice rings from the pub like a bell. The little girl waves goodbye to Ben and skips inside, taking his heart with him. It feels like all the air has been sucked from his chest.

Last year, Ben gave Rey the key to the pub and then he left, thinking it was the right thing to do. But he never would’ve left if he knew about _her_. Kira. His daughter, he’s sure of it– can feel it in his chest.

This is what all his years of therapy– all those years of bettering himself– were for; so that he can be worthy enough to be in his daughter’s life, however Rey sees fit. It will take time to win back her trust, but he won’t give up now. Not ever. 

Her inviting him here is a sign of good faith, and he won't mess it up.

Taking a deep breath, Ben pushes open the door of the pub and walks inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to apologize in advance


End file.
